Hi friends, how are you doing? Many have answered “Yes” to a BDSM lifestyle a couple of posts ago. I have been living a 24/7 BDSM lifestyle for about five years now. It is by choice, and both my dom and I thought it’s the best for us.
Only recently, I have come to the conclusion that I might be a brat. My dom mentioned a few times that he’s the brat tamer. I admire my dom, he is my world, it hurts me to disobey him. However, from time to time, I am very opinionated, my dom listens to me, communicates with me openly, allows me space to talk about my needs and desires. We discuss lots of things, from telling him about my fantasies; to what role-play we would like to do, to tell him how exactly I want the narrative to go. My dom is very open and takes my thoughts into consideration if it’s valid. He is a true gentleman, when I get frustrated about things, I may lash out, or when there is some kind of misunderstanding. I needed an explanation. My dom is the type of person who doesn’t get caught up in the heat of an argument, you will never see him losing it.
On the other hand, I often need to channel my anger; I wanted to let it out on him, to argue with him, to stimulate, to irritate him. There was only one time, he shouted out “shut the fuck up, don’t say a word until I allow you to”. At that moment, I felt this intense release of an authentic pleasure from challenging his authority, I then confirmed that he has angry, he let it out, I don’t know what it is, it just made me feel soo good knowing it. Of course, there were consequences I got disciplined that night, I realized that one of my fantasies came true.
Then I came across Cosmopolitan’s article What’s a “Brat” in BDSM by Carina Hsieh. She says “In BDSM, a brat is defined as “someone who wants to be put in their place by a dom in the form of discipline because they’ve acted bratty, acted out, or misbehaved,” explains relationship coach Carmel Jones, sex expert at The Big Fling. While the brat is still a sub, the brat might push back or act demanding and shout orders to their dom in the hopes of triggering them to discipline them more harshly in a way that caters to their fantasy of being reprimanded in a sexual way, Jones adds.
It was one of those aha moments, that I tell myself I am a brat. Although I am still exploring the role of a brat, most of the time I’d say I am not, but when my brat color came out, my dom knows how to tame me, how to put me in place. I think I’m into brat play, and my partner enjoys it too.
How about you? Are you into a brat play? Share with me your experiences because I really like to hear about them.