Ruined orgasms, as described, are a form of BDSM activity in which one partner deliberately brings the other to the edge of orgasm and then stops stimulation, resulting in a low-quality or unsatisfying climax. Here's a summary of what you should know:

1. What is a ruined orgasm? Ruined orgasms are a form of control play in BDSM. The dominant partner gets the submissive partner highly aroused and then stops stimulation just before they reach a satisfying orgasm. This can result in a low-quality or even no-sensation type of orgasm.

2. How do ruined orgasms feel? Physically, a ruined orgasm can feel like a subtle orgasm without the intense pleasure of a full climax. It may also feel slightly painful or uncomfortable due to the contractions of an orgasm without the pleasure. Emotionally, it can be frustrating, disappointing, and unsatisfying, but some individuals find pleasure in this experience, especially if they have a fetish for it.

3. How to give or have a ruined orgasm?

  • Ensure you have consent: Always obtain enthusiastic consent from all parties involved.
  • Agree upon a safe word: Establish a safe word or signal to stop the activity at any time if either partner feels uncomfortable.
  • Do your research: Learn about dominant/subordinate power dynamics and BDSM practices from reliable sources.
  • Focus on teasing your partner: The art of teasing involves slowly building sexual tension, starting and stopping stimulation to intensify the experience.
  • Stop all stimulation prior to climax: The key to a ruined orgasm is to cease all stimulation just before the submissive partner is about to climax.

4. Ruined orgasm versus edging: The main difference between a ruined orgasm and edging is that edging involves stopping stimulation temporarily to prolong pleasure, eventually leading to an intense orgasm. A ruined orgasm, on the other hand, results in minimal pleasure and is meant to leave the individual unsatisfied.

5. Why people enjoy ruined orgasms: People may enjoy ruined orgasms for various reasons, including fetish preferences, power play, control, and the mental excitement surrounding power exchange. Some individuals find it appealing because it subverts the traditional narrative of sex and orgasm, where the dominant partner controls the experience.

In summary, ruined orgasms are a niche BDSM activity that may appeal to those who enjoy power dynamics, control, and teasing in their sexual experiences. As with any sexual activity, enthusiastic consent and clear communication are essential for a safe and enjoyable experience.